After an unexplained two week absence my latest appointment lasted all of about five minutes. He hadn't had the opportunity to speak to my GP, not sure how or why but there you go. This is apparently going to happen next week after which, at some random time, he will contact me. This will be a waste of time since nothing will come of this. Why, because he is the person who's supposed to be helping me according to the service the GP referred me to.
An absolutely spot on example of this came when he finished by telling me he had an idea of how I could obtain a bus pass. Remember, this is something he agreed I should have access to (important point). He had discovered another patient, with similar issues, had been referred to another social enterprise called Alliance Housing. I don't know much about them, but they do much the same thing as he does and the rest of these groups.
You might think, ok fair enough; give them a call. That's fine and I did (six week waiting list for an assessment notwithstanding). But the real issue is this: if he supports the idea of me having a bus pass, why can't he or his organisation sign off on one? I have no idea if Alliance Housing have the authority to do this. I'm sceptical since the application form asks specifically about being a patient of the actual mental health service, not just any group. Sure it's worth a try, but I doubt you can just talk to Alliance and ask for them to do this, obviously you'd have to be assessed and then develop a relationship for them to feel ok about doing this. It still doesn't address the question, and neither did he: why can't he sign off on this? Why am I being fobbed off like this? His reason was that "it wouldn't be right" because their service is short term only.
No it makes no sense to me either. Alliance Housing aren't going to be offering lifelong support, no one is.
Thursday, 22 June 2017
Thursday, 15 June 2017
Capitalism's Inferno
Some people might think it poor taste to 'politicise' or make political 'capital' out of a tragedy.
Those people are wrong.
They are also usually the sort that defends the system that, demonstrably, leads to the deaths of innocent working class people lashed up in firetraps such as we have seen.
Make no mistake this is political. It always was and, if things inexplicably don't change, they always will. Not since the miners strike - and perhaps not even that - will you see such a verdant example of how not only capitalism fails but communism works.
It is capitalism and nothing else that has created the conditions wherein ordinary human beings, citizens of this mean malfeasant land.
The drive for profit encourages the kind of corner cutting that leads to sub standard workmanship performed on the very homes people are forced - and make no mistake no one chooses to live in high rise deathtraps - to live in.
The capitalist class structure allows those who cut costs to justify it on the basis of traducing the identities of those their decisions will affect. It's only the poor after all, and they are ten a penny.
As for the political aspect (as if what I've just said isn't enough), we have, at the very least, the Tories to thank for this. That isn't to let New Labour off the hook as they had 13 years to address the larger issue here and were happy to treat the working class no less contemptibly, but they aren't in power. The Tories are and have been for 7 years. They have put in place policies that have affected the services that the working class now are forced to rely on (because they do not have the means to supply them directly, even though they could) to help them. Crisis centres have come into being from facilities that were shut, the emergency services, even though they responded quickly, are being cut to the bone. Grenfell is in the richest borough in the country run by a Tory council, how dare anyone question the need to politicise this.
Not only that but there are questions to be asked of those Tory scumbags (tautological, I know) who repeatedly block any and all efforts to make housing safe never mind habitable. It was Gavin Barswell, a housing minister who recently lost his seat now invited back into umber ten by Theresa May, who sat on a report dealing with exactly the issue at hand. The community in that tower repeatedly entreated the authorities to address their concerns and were bullied as a result. That is class war right there, by the way.
Then there are ghouls such as the appalling inhuman cunt, Philip Davies, inexplicably voted in by the capitalist class of Shipley (who no doubt profit from his position, which says it all really). A serial proponent of the filibuster, he has form shutting down discussion. This tells you all you need to know about the modern Tory: he's so arrogant that he's unwilling to even discuss an issue that he has to shut it down completely.
No doubt during the election you will have been told how important it is to vote. That's great. But the reality is that the Tories don't believe that, when you have venal scum like Davies abusing the mechanics of legislature to shut down the discourse without allowing for even others to talk never mind a vote.
And he did this on the very topic of law making that would compel landlords (such as the class he represents) to make housing fit for habitation. An example of which would be to ensure that the properties used in building a high rise aren't likely to turn a home for families into a hellscape.
He, like the rest of his part, like the rest of those corporate interests, like the entire capitalist landlord class, are culpable. They ALL have blood on their hands.
Homes are for a community, not for profit.
David Lammy, Labour MP, talks about a charge of corporate manslaughter. That doesn't go far enough and, while I agree there should be accountability (of the swinging from the rope kind). But that cannot be allowed to stop at the door of whatever contractor is hung out to dry by the furtive masters of the capitalist class. It must encompass the entirety of the British capitalist system - and that can be an example tot he rest of the world. No pasaran.
Those people are wrong.
They are also usually the sort that defends the system that, demonstrably, leads to the deaths of innocent working class people lashed up in firetraps such as we have seen.
Make no mistake this is political. It always was and, if things inexplicably don't change, they always will. Not since the miners strike - and perhaps not even that - will you see such a verdant example of how not only capitalism fails but communism works.
It is capitalism and nothing else that has created the conditions wherein ordinary human beings, citizens of this mean malfeasant land.
The drive for profit encourages the kind of corner cutting that leads to sub standard workmanship performed on the very homes people are forced - and make no mistake no one chooses to live in high rise deathtraps - to live in.
The capitalist class structure allows those who cut costs to justify it on the basis of traducing the identities of those their decisions will affect. It's only the poor after all, and they are ten a penny.
As for the political aspect (as if what I've just said isn't enough), we have, at the very least, the Tories to thank for this. That isn't to let New Labour off the hook as they had 13 years to address the larger issue here and were happy to treat the working class no less contemptibly, but they aren't in power. The Tories are and have been for 7 years. They have put in place policies that have affected the services that the working class now are forced to rely on (because they do not have the means to supply them directly, even though they could) to help them. Crisis centres have come into being from facilities that were shut, the emergency services, even though they responded quickly, are being cut to the bone. Grenfell is in the richest borough in the country run by a Tory council, how dare anyone question the need to politicise this.
Not only that but there are questions to be asked of those Tory scumbags (tautological, I know) who repeatedly block any and all efforts to make housing safe never mind habitable. It was Gavin Barswell, a housing minister who recently lost his seat now invited back into umber ten by Theresa May, who sat on a report dealing with exactly the issue at hand. The community in that tower repeatedly entreated the authorities to address their concerns and were bullied as a result. That is class war right there, by the way.
Then there are ghouls such as the appalling inhuman cunt, Philip Davies, inexplicably voted in by the capitalist class of Shipley (who no doubt profit from his position, which says it all really). A serial proponent of the filibuster, he has form shutting down discussion. This tells you all you need to know about the modern Tory: he's so arrogant that he's unwilling to even discuss an issue that he has to shut it down completely.
No doubt during the election you will have been told how important it is to vote. That's great. But the reality is that the Tories don't believe that, when you have venal scum like Davies abusing the mechanics of legislature to shut down the discourse without allowing for even others to talk never mind a vote.
And he did this on the very topic of law making that would compel landlords (such as the class he represents) to make housing fit for habitation. An example of which would be to ensure that the properties used in building a high rise aren't likely to turn a home for families into a hellscape.
He, like the rest of his part, like the rest of those corporate interests, like the entire capitalist landlord class, are culpable. They ALL have blood on their hands.
Homes are for a community, not for profit.
David Lammy, Labour MP, talks about a charge of corporate manslaughter. That doesn't go far enough and, while I agree there should be accountability (of the swinging from the rope kind). But that cannot be allowed to stop at the door of whatever contractor is hung out to dry by the furtive masters of the capitalist class. It must encompass the entirety of the British capitalist system - and that can be an example tot he rest of the world. No pasaran.
Tuesday, 6 June 2017
Stepping Out 6
Didn't post after last week, which was stupid, as now I have to remember why I wasn't impressed afterwards.
I think it was because in so many ways this kind of mental health support feels like gaslighting. Previously he had asserted strongly I have social phobia, getting me to fill in a qustionaire. Next thing he's telling me that's not the case in such a way that I feel I've had my time wasted. I don't think that I don't have a degree of it either, but because I manage to do a thing, such as go to an increasingly racist* support place (1in4, weston super mare), therefore all the inner struggle involved in achieving that counts for nothing. That isn't helpful at all.
So today's appointment isn't happening. In fact neither is next week's - they tell me this quite matter of factly. It's as if the support isn't needed, and this is just a minor inconvenience. Oh there's nothing in the diary for next week so no appointment. It's all very clerical and not at all helpful. At least I don't have to fuss about with those stupid questionnaires for another two weeks.
To be completely honest, where is the support? I mean, the guy I talk to seems like a nice guy; I have no personal beef with him, but he hasn't actually offered any mechanism or scheme of a supportive nature at all. Other than talk to the people I've already talked to (the ASD team, for instance) he's done nothing, and talking to those people has largely been a waste of time: what is the point of talking to the liars at the Asperger service if you aren't going to accept me telling you they lied? That's what I mean by gaslighting; he cannot accept my side of the story, and why not? Professional pride? How does that help me?
Quite honestly the whole thing is pointless. He doesn't even work for Positive Step, the people who have imposed themselves into the support structure available to patients. They have subcontracted out to a different social enterprise (they all have Step in the name and seem to be primarily a housing association or something). Why? Does PS not have enough skilled staff to actually do the job? Isn't it fundamentally dishonest to compel doctors to refer patients to them and then not actually provide patients with care or support? This is the new normal. An example as to why this is an issue is that, if I could be seen by 'proper' support services (ie the NHS), then I could get them to sign off on a bus pass that would make it a lot easier to get around - which is something my 'wellness advisor' agrees with. Last he said he was going to ask my GP about referring me to such people, something I've already done myself weeks ago but nothing seems to have come of it.
These services, ostensibly intended to support people, are in the way of doing just that.
*Disappointingly last week the few people there started talking about 'foreigners' in the usual Daily Mail way. I get that people have issues with immigration, but to fall for the divide and rule rhetoric of the right wing media is to blame the symptom not the cause. They are not our enemy, we should be allying with them to smash the capitalists who's policies set us against each other in competition for what we are told, but aren't, scant resources.
Thursday, 25 May 2017
Stepping Out 5
You know I find these phone consultations to be hard work. I don't know whether it's the format or the endless questionnaire that I have to fill out every week, or the constant need on their part to reassure themselves I'm not going to slash my wrists. What would they do with a patient that said they were going to: have them arrested? Sectioned? I can't imagine many people in that positoin feel compelled to be honest. That's the problem with our system: it's not there to help you, it's there to impose a particular authority upon you. You WILL be made well.
Apparently my questionnaire response was slightly more positive this week. So what? Doesn't really mean anything. Assigning numbers to questions on a piece of paper is a poor reflection of real life. It doesn't address or assist with any of the issues at hand. Of course helping with those issues, social isolation, financial insecurity, the reality I am never going to find a career, and the cost of travelling around, is non existent. The guy I speak to means well, but it's the system: it's oppressive. We're not willing to invest in or create real solutions.
He tells me that I have social phobia, he's even sympathetic to the reality I might have aspergers (despite the lack of a diagnosis), but it means nothing. To have social phobia dealt with means I need to be 'upgraded', I need to be referred to the next treatment 'step', which is step 3. What this means is going back on to another months long waiting list. This is just ridiculous, but what can I do?
He tells me he'll talk to the aspergers diagnostic team, the people that have already lied to me (I explained this to him, for all the good it will do). I doubt it will make any difference. They aren't going to change their mind without good cause, and I can't give them good cause. There is no functioning way to diagnose an adult with an ASD condition. This is stupid, obviously; but it's how the system 'works'.
There's a bus pass scheme that's available for people with mental health issues as well. He even thinks I should be able to get one. Unfortunately the problem is that I need to be a patient of the local mental health service. Instead of being a patient I am diverted to these secondary services. It's self defeating, but I guess that's the point. I'm sure if the Tories get back in, and they will unfortunately, such schemes won't last much longer anyway.
Apparently my questionnaire response was slightly more positive this week. So what? Doesn't really mean anything. Assigning numbers to questions on a piece of paper is a poor reflection of real life. It doesn't address or assist with any of the issues at hand. Of course helping with those issues, social isolation, financial insecurity, the reality I am never going to find a career, and the cost of travelling around, is non existent. The guy I speak to means well, but it's the system: it's oppressive. We're not willing to invest in or create real solutions.
He tells me that I have social phobia, he's even sympathetic to the reality I might have aspergers (despite the lack of a diagnosis), but it means nothing. To have social phobia dealt with means I need to be 'upgraded', I need to be referred to the next treatment 'step', which is step 3. What this means is going back on to another months long waiting list. This is just ridiculous, but what can I do?
He tells me he'll talk to the aspergers diagnostic team, the people that have already lied to me (I explained this to him, for all the good it will do). I doubt it will make any difference. They aren't going to change their mind without good cause, and I can't give them good cause. There is no functioning way to diagnose an adult with an ASD condition. This is stupid, obviously; but it's how the system 'works'.
There's a bus pass scheme that's available for people with mental health issues as well. He even thinks I should be able to get one. Unfortunately the problem is that I need to be a patient of the local mental health service. Instead of being a patient I am diverted to these secondary services. It's self defeating, but I guess that's the point. I'm sure if the Tories get back in, and they will unfortunately, such schemes won't last much longer anyway.
Tuesday, 16 May 2017
Stepping Out 4
Been a little while since last we 'stepped out', but as of last week I see to have a stable service, albeit on the phone.
Over the phone is a little difficult. It makes interaction difficult. Even though social environments can be tricky for me (I tend to tire when I'm asked lots of questions, especially ones that are devoid of necessary context), the telephone is much more of an effort. I feel I have to speak even when I'd rather not because that's much more necessary. I have to acknowledge every spoken word much more. It's harder work.
That said they seem to have found someone who, despite the service's unfortunate propensity for endless endless questions and questionnaires, has a better understanding of my situation. Of course he doesn't personally have the power to solve these issues, at least he recognises that social isolation is a major problem and that without recourse to affordable (preferably free) public transport nothing he offers will be worth a damn. Unfortunately the travelcard scheme available requires specific conditions be met. He's willing to meet them - if he's allowed. The question is whether his service falls into the category of those that can sign off on that.
He's also discussing the issue of social anxiety. I've never been terribly impressed with that diagnosis because it always seems rather disposable and lightweight. It's another poorly regarded and flimsy mental health descriptor - because no one takes it seriously it seems to me. They should because we are social creatures, we have to function in what passes for our society these days - so if you can't, you're a bit screwed!
More importantly, he is correctly linking this to neuro diversity - the test I had for aspergers a couple of years ago that went nowhere. I have warned him to expect little from the diagnostic team since their testing process is rubbish and they have been caught in a lie (saying simultaneously that a full developmental history is required for a full diagnosis, and then saying it wouldn't have mattered anyway - can't be both). I am under no illusion they will hold to their procedures and believe they have acted with integrity (I was promised a discussion with the Attention Deficit Disorder people that, when I followed up, was told no such promise was ever made). However if he can gather more evidence through these endless endless questions, it might lend some weight to my cause. I'm not getting my hopes up though.
Ultimately though he can only do so much. I have to go through all this because that is what the medical profession expects and if you don't play the game, they refuse to listen at all. It's far from perfect, but maybe at last something might shift.
Over the phone is a little difficult. It makes interaction difficult. Even though social environments can be tricky for me (I tend to tire when I'm asked lots of questions, especially ones that are devoid of necessary context), the telephone is much more of an effort. I feel I have to speak even when I'd rather not because that's much more necessary. I have to acknowledge every spoken word much more. It's harder work.
That said they seem to have found someone who, despite the service's unfortunate propensity for endless endless questions and questionnaires, has a better understanding of my situation. Of course he doesn't personally have the power to solve these issues, at least he recognises that social isolation is a major problem and that without recourse to affordable (preferably free) public transport nothing he offers will be worth a damn. Unfortunately the travelcard scheme available requires specific conditions be met. He's willing to meet them - if he's allowed. The question is whether his service falls into the category of those that can sign off on that.
He's also discussing the issue of social anxiety. I've never been terribly impressed with that diagnosis because it always seems rather disposable and lightweight. It's another poorly regarded and flimsy mental health descriptor - because no one takes it seriously it seems to me. They should because we are social creatures, we have to function in what passes for our society these days - so if you can't, you're a bit screwed!
More importantly, he is correctly linking this to neuro diversity - the test I had for aspergers a couple of years ago that went nowhere. I have warned him to expect little from the diagnostic team since their testing process is rubbish and they have been caught in a lie (saying simultaneously that a full developmental history is required for a full diagnosis, and then saying it wouldn't have mattered anyway - can't be both). I am under no illusion they will hold to their procedures and believe they have acted with integrity (I was promised a discussion with the Attention Deficit Disorder people that, when I followed up, was told no such promise was ever made). However if he can gather more evidence through these endless endless questions, it might lend some weight to my cause. I'm not getting my hopes up though.
Ultimately though he can only do so much. I have to go through all this because that is what the medical profession expects and if you don't play the game, they refuse to listen at all. It's far from perfect, but maybe at last something might shift.
Thursday, 27 April 2017
Every Day is on Shifting Sands
Just read the local rag. The headline: an ex serviceman commits suicide. He couldn't cope.
Who can live like that?
There is no security in this society. One day you can be financially secure, the next you are dependent on the generosity of aggrieved millionaires who, for long ages in this country, have cornered the seat of power. They control the education establishments that are little more than breeding pits for government. They learn the special handshakes that move them, like fat chess pieces, across the board that is our society. Guess who the pawns are.
Who can live like that?
If you are out of work every day is on shifting sands. You are running just to stand still, just to stay in place. Yours is the lot of people who would otherwise be peers and comrades were it not for artifical barriers that separate us. These are the administrators of a system they do not control that keeps them frightened. To process that they must persecute us. They must make us jump through the most trivial of hoops.
Ours is a system that deliberately seeks to undermine the lot of those it was deisnged to help, and those it was designed to help have no opportunity to steer the policies that govern it. Again those policies are in the hands of the most powerful. People that will never need social security or welfare, but who are the most aggrieved about its existence. People who already benefit from the public purse in considerable ways: tax avoidance, tax reductions, subsidies, corporate benefits, expenses, and so on. But those are acceptable perks when it comes to the working rich. Or even, in the case of those who earn so much they can work but hours per year, the not-so-working rich.
Who can live like that?
Sooner or later this system will have to give way. It cannot hold. I do not believe humans can exist in this way. Perhaps Labour's seemingly inevitable demise will spur on some form of change, but change there must be.
Are we to become a sad little island, anchored off the coast of former allies now adrift in a sea of bitter division and sanitised past glory? Who can really say we were glorious when our empire was built on blood and bigotry. Perhaps this is our just deserts. We are to become the sick old man off the coast of western Europe, a bedlam ruled by impotent monarchs and political chancers who parade business credentials like beguiling toys, waved in front of those they deem inferior in order to secure power. The cult of John Galt bred to power in the stockbroker belt and the shires of a country that was once proud to care about its weakest constituents.
Now we live in fear that our independence will be taken and sold to the American private health insurance market in the name of support, while our children can look forward to Christmas meals provided by foodbanks, attending failings schools as starved as they are. Parents forced into zero hours contracts to bolster the profit margins of fat tyrants just so they can have the money to travel to the south of France and brag about how their squalid gulags sell the best sweatshop-sewn products in the developed world.
Pull up the drawbridge they say, so we can lock out the world outside. Full of people who want a piece of our glory. If only they knew.
Who can live like that?
There is no security in this society. One day you can be financially secure, the next you are dependent on the generosity of aggrieved millionaires who, for long ages in this country, have cornered the seat of power. They control the education establishments that are little more than breeding pits for government. They learn the special handshakes that move them, like fat chess pieces, across the board that is our society. Guess who the pawns are.
Who can live like that?
If you are out of work every day is on shifting sands. You are running just to stand still, just to stay in place. Yours is the lot of people who would otherwise be peers and comrades were it not for artifical barriers that separate us. These are the administrators of a system they do not control that keeps them frightened. To process that they must persecute us. They must make us jump through the most trivial of hoops.
Ours is a system that deliberately seeks to undermine the lot of those it was deisnged to help, and those it was designed to help have no opportunity to steer the policies that govern it. Again those policies are in the hands of the most powerful. People that will never need social security or welfare, but who are the most aggrieved about its existence. People who already benefit from the public purse in considerable ways: tax avoidance, tax reductions, subsidies, corporate benefits, expenses, and so on. But those are acceptable perks when it comes to the working rich. Or even, in the case of those who earn so much they can work but hours per year, the not-so-working rich.
Who can live like that?
Sooner or later this system will have to give way. It cannot hold. I do not believe humans can exist in this way. Perhaps Labour's seemingly inevitable demise will spur on some form of change, but change there must be.
Are we to become a sad little island, anchored off the coast of former allies now adrift in a sea of bitter division and sanitised past glory? Who can really say we were glorious when our empire was built on blood and bigotry. Perhaps this is our just deserts. We are to become the sick old man off the coast of western Europe, a bedlam ruled by impotent monarchs and political chancers who parade business credentials like beguiling toys, waved in front of those they deem inferior in order to secure power. The cult of John Galt bred to power in the stockbroker belt and the shires of a country that was once proud to care about its weakest constituents.
Now we live in fear that our independence will be taken and sold to the American private health insurance market in the name of support, while our children can look forward to Christmas meals provided by foodbanks, attending failings schools as starved as they are. Parents forced into zero hours contracts to bolster the profit margins of fat tyrants just so they can have the money to travel to the south of France and brag about how their squalid gulags sell the best sweatshop-sewn products in the developed world.
Pull up the drawbridge they say, so we can lock out the world outside. Full of people who want a piece of our glory. If only they knew.
Tuesday, 25 April 2017
Yet Again, There Is No Help (part infinite)
How many different ways are there to say the same thing, and make the same point?
There just isn't help.
At all.
At.
All.
After a night of no sleep, and a sweaty subconsciousness pricking and intensifying my fear of a Tory majority, I decide to make a GP appointment to get a referral to the Primary Care Liaison Service for mental health. These are supposed to be the experts, unfortunately the GP can't guarantee they will listen. The main reason for this is that Positive Step (see my Stepping Out posts) have been given monopoly over provision.
I fully expect that, as I'm not schizophrenic or psychotic, so they won't be interested.
What is most frustrating is that, the more limited the options, the more disinterested the doctor. They have less to offer and so the less they seem to care. This is a weird and disturbing corollary.
The message here is: depression (aka "low mood") is not a serious issue. The pervasive level of stress in our society has increased such that those like me with what is now deemed a relatively less significant issue can expect no help. Or at best, a cursory service that at best pays lip service to mental help. Not one that gets to the heart of why people have these problems, dealing with issues of isolation, lack of opportunity, and of course struggling to survive in a world where the powerful control the purse strings.
So as this pressure increases, like a rising water level in the bottom of a well, we can only expect this to get worse. Given the nightmare of a prospective Tory majority, this is all the more likely. There is, of course, little chance of unseating the Tories locally. They dominate in this area through the landed gentry and all the 'independent businessmen' (which also explains how UKIP has done so well locally, depressingly).
So there was that, and, when I got back from the GP, a nice brown envelop on the doormat informing me that I have a Work Focussed Interview booked for me on the 8th in the afternoon.
Ain't life great - and I feel I have no control over mine.
There just isn't help.
At all.
At.
All.
After a night of no sleep, and a sweaty subconsciousness pricking and intensifying my fear of a Tory majority, I decide to make a GP appointment to get a referral to the Primary Care Liaison Service for mental health. These are supposed to be the experts, unfortunately the GP can't guarantee they will listen. The main reason for this is that Positive Step (see my Stepping Out posts) have been given monopoly over provision.
I fully expect that, as I'm not schizophrenic or psychotic, so they won't be interested.
What is most frustrating is that, the more limited the options, the more disinterested the doctor. They have less to offer and so the less they seem to care. This is a weird and disturbing corollary.
The message here is: depression (aka "low mood") is not a serious issue. The pervasive level of stress in our society has increased such that those like me with what is now deemed a relatively less significant issue can expect no help. Or at best, a cursory service that at best pays lip service to mental help. Not one that gets to the heart of why people have these problems, dealing with issues of isolation, lack of opportunity, and of course struggling to survive in a world where the powerful control the purse strings.
So as this pressure increases, like a rising water level in the bottom of a well, we can only expect this to get worse. Given the nightmare of a prospective Tory majority, this is all the more likely. There is, of course, little chance of unseating the Tories locally. They dominate in this area through the landed gentry and all the 'independent businessmen' (which also explains how UKIP has done so well locally, depressingly).
So there was that, and, when I got back from the GP, a nice brown envelop on the doormat informing me that I have a Work Focussed Interview booked for me on the 8th in the afternoon.
Ain't life great - and I feel I have no control over mine.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)