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Addendum

Just rang the jobcentre about tomorrow. I thought that was the best thing to do. No point messing them around, despite being booked an appointment at a time I can't attend. Can't take the chance of turning up late and being left high and dry as regards money. They've booked me a normal signing for 9-50am wherein I will book a fresh appointment with the 'special adviser'.

That's assuming I don't get dicked around tomorrow morning instead. Maybe it's my anxiety based paranoia talking but I can't help wondering if they will.

Everytime I sign on, and this is the crux of what makes the experience so exquisitely awful, is the knowledge that yet again you must prove your worth. It's like a neverending round of the X Factor - you thought you were safe last week Mr Plums, but no, you've got to bring it this week as well - and this week it's Temp Agency Week!

All the effort you made before, no matter how many jobsearch activities or applications (mainly the former tbh) you did when last you signed don't count. Your effort has reset and you must wow the judges afresh. Not only that, but by this point your pittance has reached bingo fuel and you NEED that money. So all it takes is for the adviser to look over the jobsearch record a moment too long, ask one too many questions about what 'this' activity is or who 'that' person you spoke to is, and it's stress factor 10 again! One little thing you forgot to do and all the rest of it will count for nothing and BOOM no money for you.

(Now this doesn't sound right to me, but that seems to be how they operate. I don't know if legally they are allowed to do that - but, as they say in the ghostbusting business, who are you going to call?)

Remember: don't have nightmares.

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ADD

Thursday today (unless time has confused me again!), the day between yesterday's appointment with The Psychologist, and signing on tomorrow. A brief oasis for me to discuss said appointment as it was a test for 'neurodiverse tendencies'. I think that's the best way of putting it; it's all a bit vague really. When I first saw The Psychologist I mentioned that I was in the process of trying to get a diagnosis for Aspergers to which she replied she could do a test that, while not an official diagnosis, could count towards one - or something. Something official anyway, though bizarrely after the test was completed (took a couple of hours) she said she wasn't trained for Aspergers specifically.

The test itself was a kind of Krypton Factor lite (sans exercise course): a mix of recall, pattern recognition, problem solving, and questionnaire. I was asked to arrange coloured blocks into a prescribed pattern, to spot what was missing from a series of pictures, to guess fr…