Warning: this might sound incredibly ungrateful.
Yesterday the brown envelope arrived. It's been three months since my WCA. During that time I have prepared myself, as best I could, for failure. However it appears I have, again, succeeded. At least in respect of the Work Related Activity Group. The upshot of this is that I continue to attend compulsory biannual (at least for now) Work Focused Interviews. In fact my last one was a week or so after the WCA appointment. It was also a complete waste of time for reasons I've mentioned before. These interviews cannot help since they, essentially, are about victim blaming.
By my calculations I anticipate the next will be in January. It could even be next month. Failure to attend will affect a claim so passing the WCA is no guarantee of piece of mind at all. I am still having to watch the pennies in case the DWP pulls the rainy day button. It's insane really, that money has to be saved and not spent accordingly. Putting it back into the economy would be a better situation all round you'd think.
Believe me I could spend it!
It's a bitter victory because for three months I've institutionalised myself to the possibility of failure. Now that hasn't happened I'm still no better off in terms of freedom. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad not to have failed. I consider myself desperately lucky in that respect. But the arrival of success as a reality is a more mundane reality that imagined. I thought about what I might like to do with the money. That I might treat myself, but of course that just brings back the concerns about money, something that's forever been a source of guilt in my life.
I have never been a rich person, though, fortunately again, my circumstances are better than many. I'm lucky that I have a decent enough roof over my head and don't need to use a foodbank. But these are such basic concerns that, in 21st century Britain, surely no one should have to worry about their basic needs being met. Yet we know that isn't the case.
The amount paid on benefits really is such a pittance that you can't make informed choices at all. With enough money I could make significant changes and at least try to move forward. Yet the mindset of our leaders is such that it is best to keep people near poverty. Depressingly they criticise benefits as being a trap without realising the trap comes from the pittance they begrudgingly offer. Something that's merely a political football.
Yes I've succeeded. I'm damned lucky to have done so. But the reality of that success is just the realisation you are not any better off than before. In fact I have no idea when the next WCA call up will be. It 'should' be a year or so. But it could be anytime, though much likely to be later. It took them two years to organise this one and even that wasn't conducted properly (perhaps that was for the best!). Meanwhile I'm forced to attend work focused interviews and be dazzled with the dearth of opportunities that are on offer. Sooner or later my claim will be migrated from ESA to Universal Credit, or so I'm told. Won't that be fun.
What I need this system cannot provide. It is administered by people who see you as weapons in the political war for votes. Not people to invest in.
I hope this doesn't make me sound too ungrateful. I've won a prize. I just don't see how it changes my life. Things should be better than this. No one should have to deal with this rotten system to begin with. It's only a victory because the alternative is so terrible. The prize of not starving for an indeterminate period - until your next assessment. Round and round it goes
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