Monday 16 November 2020

Idiots On Parade 1: Through A Cabinet Darkly

...to self isolation!

This time I'm sure there's nothing to worry about. What could possible go wrong when you stand dangerously close to a halfwit Tory. Pro tip: they are all halfwits. I was being tautologically tautological.

At the risk of sounding monstrous. I simply don't care whether he lives or dies at this point. We have teachers working with greater risk darkly and they haven't the luxury of self isolating in privilege grace and favour housing. Besides it's not as if Boris does anything or makes any important decisions; the guy responsible for that quit the pother day. Hopefully he took all the bad decisions with him, though I suspect another bad decision maker will be found to make ever more increasingly bad decisions at a time when that needs to stop happening. The bad decisions.

Matt Hancock, who prioritises his links with the jockey fraternity (see; Dido Harding and the Cheltenham Festival fiascofarce) above health care, opines that it would be great if people could get tests for Christmas so they can hug their care home bound relatives on Jesus' birthday. The care homes whose staff nearly died for want of PPE several months ago, and who work for a pittance in the economy Matt Hancock champions. Funny old world. It's all so patronising really; the idea we can just slop a coat of shitty glitter over a situation and get away with it because it's Christmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas! Like smearing Vaseline over the lens to ocver Miss Piggy's indiscretions. I can think of a few things I'd like to smear Mr Hancock in, and none of them are the sort that you find in Ann Summers.

That got weird, quickly.

The government has bought 5 million doses of the Moderna vaccine, which boasts 95% success. Of course it has yet to be officially release, like all these products. Five million seems bizarrely small; how is that going to achieve herd immunity? Is this because of Brexit, or general governmental incompetence? IS there a difference.

The reality is that, in this stage of the plague, we have abandoned everything to hope. It could have been different. We could have learned from countries that have handled this properly. Imagine if that was the case globally, the synergy would have helped stem the spread immeasurably. But there's no profit in sublimating ego. 

In reality a vaccine or even just the promise of one, which is all we have right now, is no short cut to normality. When these products arrive (if), people will still have to obey social distancing and wear masks etc. There's no way we can safely test the effects on grandma since that will involve infecting her with the virus, so the whole thing is taken on faith. We'll only know if it works...when it works. At some point the scienticians will say that now we can all come out of our underground plague bunkers and peel off the masks, now permanently affixed to our faces with a film of sweat. There will be a mass burning in which the apparition of covid will waft from the flames like an evil smoke. It will smell of Sulfur and Barnard Castle. Only then will we know for sure if it worked, in the months ahead.

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