Anyone believing that lockdown, the winter remix, was going to be fun is clearly wrong. I doubt any such people exist. It is no lie to say that this time around, I am feeling more stressed and anxious. As the days get shorter and the weather commensurately rubbish they also feel longer: hours tick for longer as I struggle to fill them. To be clear, there are things I could do but I am both filled with lethargy and restless. I don't want to be here. I want the opportunity to do something meaningful to stretch my legs, other than just stretch my legs.
And god knows they need stretching (I hate exercise, the way Indiana Jones hates snakes). I'm becoming filled with hate. Hate for the Tories, that is. But it threatens to percolate, becoming a pervasive constant hatred. Animated by itself. I don't want to be like that, but I have all the time in the world now and there is plenty to justify it.
This isn't an argument against lockdown. It's an argument against the continued mishandling of this crisis. It's reaching a point now where I can't imagine a day going by that doesn't include another example of utter incompetence mixed, like piss in wine, with corruption. It's just become white noise at this point. Like television static (remember that?). It's there all the time, pixels of cracking colliding snow that end up in the wallets of people like Dido Harding.
Christ I hate that woman's face. She sort of strained smile she effects. A look like a smacked arse. It's indignant; how dare you question that I receive 65 grand a year for doing precisely fuck all - for driving the bus backwards. Meanwhile the staff in the call centres driven to distraction by the script they are forced to read instead of actually helping people are working full time for less than half that. Capitalism is a sick joke. Are we even actually any closer to a working test system? Of course not, they are now hoping that a can of pfizzy Pfizer vaccine will save them from themselves.
This useless government can't even make up its mind whether or not it hates/likes Joe Biden. I know what I think. He's a rich old man who will shore up capital and inspire the next Donald Trump by being everything Trump campaigns against - even though Trump is part of that swamp and just as corrupt. More so, in some ways, as he's willing to wepaonise horrific social injustice and inequality to make his point. Perhaps he'll rise from the grave in Election Horror The Sequel and drag Biden, and thus America, into the depths of civil war. It's not impossible - saying that makes me feel like I've passed through the looking glass. It's actually a possibility.
The working class across the world remains divided and the left, the conventional left, has no understanding, nor any willingness to. Instead the smartypants crew over at Novara will cite arcane historic figures and scenarios while cheer leading for the beige terror himself. The Ultimate Centrist, Keir Starmer. A man so bland he could only come into being if Thanos willed it. The Banality Gem. The Unity candidate who will unify Labour under capital at all costs, specifically the cost of the working class.
Anyone that thinks they have a chance of taking their party back is fooling themselves. Labour are done. They never were anything special. Everything they did was within the confines of Capital. Even the NHS exists within a capitalist paradigm: it's theirs not ours. Meaning they can take it back at any time, they being the ruling class, and that's exactly what's happening now. Labour aren't it's champions any more than they are ours. It's sad so many committed hard working activists are willing to throw their time away. Stop funding Corbyn, he's a lame duck - don't worry he'll be alright. Go into your communities and make the state irrelevant. Labour won't help us, not now not ever again. There's only us.
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